Ah, a word!

Matthew 6:33 - But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

God's version of focus on the forrest, not the trees! Great stuff!

Ahhh... Just Pray

I am going through, let's see, what would you call it? A time of growth, maybe revelation, definately healing. I've been wanting to blog about it but it's just still too new and in many ways too raw.

But it's good. It's not some horrible experience that I am dreading, rather I keep asking myself, "Who am I that God would be so mindful of me to bring me to this place at this time with definate boundaries to control the experience?" (Cause I definately need boundaries to slow me down!)

I know that I need to be here. I know that it serves a purpose (even though I don't fully understand all that that purpose entails) and I know that God is near.

So I ask that you pray for me. Pray that I keep this about God and what He is doing in my life and don't try and make it about me (cause I sure like to do that). Pray for the other people experiencing it with me, that they know and do God's will in this also. And pray for the people around me who normally help me through things, that God will give them a willing heart to help me and understanding of God's plan as well.

Sunday in church God clearly humbled me and brought me to my knees to pray for His guidance and protection. I know that He is here, I know that He has a plan, I know this is critical (as Beth Moore would say) and thanks to His revelation on Sunday, I am not too proud to ask for prayers.

I know this is very vague but it's all I have for now because I am still processing the info. Dealing with past hurts is not easy but very necessary. Just know that this is not some life or death scenario, I'm merely overcoming past pain and and making amends for past mistakes. Nevertheless, I covet your prayers.

Prayer Request

I have much to post, God has really been moving lately but for now I have a prayer request. See the below info and please, get on your knees for my friend. (I have posted a pic so you can see who you are praying for.)

I am asking all of you to pray for my friend Tammy Deluca. (Some of you may remember me asking you to pray for her last March.) Tammy is 34 years old and was diagnosed with glandular cervical Cancer in March (this form of cancer is rare in that it forms in the glands of your cervix). At that time, they decided to do a new procedure called a radical trachelectomy where they remove your cervix and leave in your uterus. They were hopeful that it would remove the cancer and still leave Tammy able to have kids one day. Yesterday Tammy found out that her cancer is back. It is cervical cancer that has metastasized to her lymph nodes, rectum, pelvic wall and uterus. She has multiple tumors ranging in size from 5mm to 50mm (about the size of a softball). She will see her oncologist on Wednesday to set appointments to begin chemotherapy, at this time the cancer is too far along to do a hysterectomy. Please pray for Tammy and her family and forward this email to anyone you know who is a prayer warrior. Also, her family has asked that we get her on as many prayer chains as possible, so please if you know of any, include her name. Thank you in advance for your prayers and have a Merry Christmas.

In His Grace,
Lindy

God Rocks!

I'm sure that heading really surprises you right? Probably not but it seems like every single time I feel that God is mindful of me, I am completely stunned. I know I should probably accept that He can do that by now but it blows my mind every single time! He, the creator of the universe, the one tasked with holding all this together, actually takes the time to choregraph things to speak to me at the exact moment it is needed. Doesn't that just astonish you! It does me, everytime and this is NOT the first time yet still I stand amazed.

I'm sure you are wondering what in the world I am talking about. I started a new bible study (yes, I have been slacking in this area and am in desperate need of a word) so I began one that I am doing with my (God-given) "maw". Today's lesson was really about control and trusting God to work things out. For those of you who know me, I am a CONTROL-FREAK! (There I said it.) I needed to hear this lesson. God knows I needed to hear this message. He also knows that I am hard-headed so He went ahead and decided to give me a double-dose! After my lesson, I checked me email and don't you know that one of my email devotionals was titled, "Who's Battle Is It?", and I quote, "In other words, it’s God’s problem. Let him solve it." Thank you Rick Warren. And thank you God, back to back, 2 lessons on trusting God and giving up control. (Did I mention I was a control-freak?) You just have to love God. Isn't He the best!

On another note, Happy Belated Thanksgiving. I had a wonderful time visiting with my family (and extended family/friends) in South Texas. We ate tons of food, laughed a lot and my nephew shot his first deer. The highlight of my trip was watching/helping, mostly wathing Daddy White get his windmill up and running. Great stuff! Hope you have a wonderful week!

Letting Go

I just hate it when God lets you know that it's time to let go. There are people in my life, well mostly my past actually, that I miss really badly. I know how to get in touch with them or I can find out how and some I really want to but I get the feeling that God is saying let it go. I've been here before. We've done this before. With people, things, activities, etc. Sometimes He allows them to come back later, sometimes they are gone for good and all-n-all, I know it's what is best for me or them or us. But still, I hate it! It never gets less painful. It may get easier to actually do but it never stops to hurt when you do and it never gets easier to feel the loss. So here's to letting go.

Tid Bits

First things first, guess where I've been this morning? I suppose the picture gives it away. So here is my plea for you to go out and vote today. Remember that it is a priviledge to live in a country where we have a say in what goes on. ONE vote DOES count so don't try and fool yourself into thinking that no one will miss your vote, they will. Last night I was "voting" for my favorite on Dancing with The Stars and the irony was not lost on me. I wonder how many people take the time to vote for their favorite dancer or American Idol but will not go stand in line to vote for the person who will run their country for the next 4 years. Come on people! Do you even know who won American Idol Season 3 anymore? How about Season 2 of Dancing with The Stars? But I bet you remember who has won every presidential election since you've been alive. Go out there and VOTE for your president today. And while you are waiting in line (thinking how bored you are), why don't you take a minute to say a prayer for all the brave men and women who are out there right now protecting your right to vote and hoping to give others in different countries the right to do the same. It hit me when I was taking the picture of my "I Voted" sticker, just how many people are sacrificing so that I CAN STAND IN LINE AND BE BORED! I imagine they are NOT real bored right now. Make use of their sacrifice and make your voice heard!

OK, I'm off my soap box! I think... Anyway, I discovered 2 things this week. One is that we often fool ourselves into thinking that we are one place when in reality, we aren't. I heard some information from a friend of mine that brought up something from my past. Instead of being unaffected as I thought I would be, it really messed with my head. See, I thought I was over that but apparently not. The issue wasn't present so I had fooled myself into thinking that I had completely dealt with it and left it behind. But when it came up, I saw where I really was. I guess the good thing in all this is that God is helping me to see where I really am and to hopefully move forward for good this time. I guess sometimes we just need a break and then He brings us back for round 2.

The other thing is to not give up. I almost quit Boot Camp. I really wanted to. Last Wednesday was hard but last Friday was brutal! I did NOT want to go back on Monday. But I prayed and prayed and prayed and with God's help, I showed up Monday. It was no where near as hard as Friday mostly because I pushed myself as far as I knew I could go but not as far as the girl who runs EVERY DAY. I had to find my limit and go there, not to anyone else's limit. I am still sore today but I am very glad that I did not quit. So have a good day AND....

GO VOTE! And pray for a service man while you're there. Now I'm done, I think...

We Match

Evan is my favorite little dude at church. So when I found out we were both dressing 50's Style for Halloween, I had to take a picture with him. Love that boy! Check out his shoes! He's going to be a famous drummer one day by the way!

Too much, too little!

Is is just me or does there never seem to be enough days in the fall? Seems like most of the year I am looking for things to do, then the fall and holiday season start and there are never enough days. Why does everything pile up in October, November and December. And by that I don't just mean holiday stuff, I mean life stuff, usually fun stuff: concerts, games, meetings, events, etc. etc. etc. What is everyone else doing the rest of the year?

Week One and New Insights

So this morning I completed week 1 of boot camp. Today seemed a little easier than the other 2 days. Don't know if I'm more in shape or if Cody took it easy on us.

I am disappointed in my mood this morning though. I woke up fine then checked my voice mail and was upset by the message I got. It really brought me down. Which leads me to my next point or question or rambling.

Co-dependency is my newest topic of conversation with God. Mostly because I am guilty of it. This is our (me and God's) ongoing issue at the moment. I will say this. I am co-dependent in that I should not let other people's drama or problems affect my mood, like it did this morning, but I really feel like God and I had a break-through in what is and what isn't co-dependency.

Night before last I was praying about this. Mostly just rambling to Him that I hate it that people try to make me feel bad for caring about what goes on in the lives of the people I love. And some new thoughts came to me. Yes, I should not let their actions affect my life but it is ok to care. Here's the thing, it hurts my heart when people I love are hurting and it fills me with joy when people I love are happy. To me that is normal. I am an emotional person, that is the way God wired me. And people (by that I mean people who are extremely close to me) tell me that is not a good thing. But after the other night, I do not agree. They try to tell me that I shouldn't feel emotions about the lives of the people I love. But think about this. Can you really love someone (agape love) and not care about them? That is essentially what people are telling me to do. If you love someone, you should care about them. Look at God for example. He loves me. He hurts for me when I hurt and He's happy for me when I'm happy, or so I've always been taught. The creator of the universe sits on His throne and guess what, He cares about what's happening in my life. He does not sit there unattached emotionally from what is going on. He loves me and because of that, He cares. Now, being perfect and all, He does not let what happens in my life affect His but He does care. There's the line that I have trouble with and am learning about.

So that break-through really helped me personally but I got to wondering about why people try to make me think otherwise. Could it be that to "love" and not care is really just about self-protection? A way to isolate yourself from being hurt by other people? I really don't have that answer, it's really just more a thought to ponder. But I do know this: I care about the people I love and that's ok. Now I just need to work on that line... Pray for me :)

You can do it...

I am currently experimenting with fonts to see which one looks best on my page. It's an annoying OCD thing I have when it comes to graphics! But anyway.

So I learned this week that with enough prayer and a little want to, you can do things you never thought you could. Physically I have been in a pit so I decided to sign up for a 4 week boot camp with some friends. If you know me, you know that I am in NO WAY athletically gifted. But I needed a jump start to get myself back on track at the gym. I figured I could force myself to do it but the BIG problem is that the class is at 5:00 AM, yes, that's AM. I am NOT a morning person. I like to stay up late and sleep late. But I decided that if God could wake me up at 5:00 am on Sundays to work at church, He could wake me up at 4:15 am to get my temple in shape. And surprise, surprise, surprise, HE HAS! While I realize I may be jumping the gun with this declaration (I've only done 2 days so far) what is amazing is that I am not just awake but that I am actually speaking and civil to people this early. That is a major change for me. Did I mention that I am NOT a morning person! While I cannot say the class is easy, I am doing it and for the most part still walking when it's over (may look a little funny doing it but I am). So there you have it, lesson for the day: Give it to God and He will deliver!

Life or Something Like it!

So I convinced my friend Leah to start a blog. She is going to Peru for 3 years to be a missionary and I told her this would be the best way to keep people informed. Then I had to sign up for an account to follow her blog so I decided to start my own. I've actually been considering it for sometime now. I read on a friend's blog that she thought it was important to leave a leagacy for her family. While I totally agree with that, I don't know if I have anything near important enough to say that would be considered leaving a legacy but I do know that we can all help each other make it through this journey here on earth by sharing experiences. So beware, this probably will just be me rambling about my life and times but I hope that somewhere in the middle of all the jibberish you may find something to help you through this life (or something like it).